Ups and Downs

This was a tough week inside my own head after my follow up with my medical oncologist on Tuesday. So, I’m forcing myself to focus on the good stuff:

• Overall, I’m feeling good and functioning.
• Radiation on my hip finished yesterday and I’m not experiencing side effects.
• My tumor markers went down significantly and this is a very good sign although we won’t have confirmation that I’m responding to treatment until after the first couple of scans which means 6 months (ugh).
• I am in more pain than I was a couple of weeks ago and that could be the bones starting to heal. She used a word that starts with R that I can’t remember. I was worried it meant treatment wasn’t working. She explained that bones tend to light up on scans with this medicine because of good activity. 

Here’s the stuff I’m not happy about:

• My white blood cell counts are down so I’m taking a break from what I consider my main treatment, kisqali/ribociclib. I’ll go back Tuesday for more bloodwork and can hopefully start again.
• I’m on 600mg so if this happens again after my next round, she’s going to lower me to 400mg which I’m told is just as effective. But, how can it be? My doctor and my case nurse from my insurance group both assure me it is.

This week we also had a tough conversation about pain medicine as I’ve been resistant to taking it mainly because I’m not in that much pain. Why put more in my body than necessary? She thought I was concerned about addiction, but my other concern is my cognitive function. I want to stay sharp. After being assured I’d be ok, this week I’m taking ibuprofen in the morning, again in the afternoon and Tramadol at night. And I feel good. Almost too good? How will I know if there is pain I need to be worried about? See the things I find to worry about?

The support from family and friends has been wonderful. I appreciate the messages with thoughts & prayers, the cards, and more. I smile thinking about our support system and appreciate each and every one of you.

We had quite the ice storm in Buffalo this week. Dan’s been outside chipping away at the ice in the driveway and taking Lucy out to make sure I don’t fall. There isn’t a better guy out there. He’s also doing his best to address my worries and move us on to something else. God was looking out for me when he put Dan on my path.